Gastronomic Match

Nishi was browsing through online profiles when a chat request popped up. Who was this?

"Age 34, senior management professional in some multinational. Lives in Bangalore"

Hmmm. Nishi had begun to notice the gendered differences in the way these profiles were written. Women dwelled more on their looks: slim, fair, blah blah while men waxed eloquent on their qualifications, jobs and salaries. Showed what society, or rather marriage, expected of them.

Accepting the chat request, Nishi typed in 'Hi'

Social niceties out of the way, Nishi typed in a question about the guy's interests and hobbies.

Hmmm. These chats seemed to be scripted and followed a template. First, the social graces. Hi, Hello, How are you etc etc. Then the exploratory 'Tell me something about yourself'. Then more focused probing. Right now, the conversation was dwelling on food.

'I'm a foodie' said Nishi 'I love to eat and like to try different types of cuisine. My only limitation is that I'm a vegetarian'.

Speed breaker! Oh-oh.

'Vegetarian? But I'm from eastern India'

'Meaning?' Nishi knew what he meant. But she wanted it said anyway.

'I'm non vegetarian' he clarified.

'OK. I have no problems with that' said Nishi with growing irritation. She knew where this conversation was headed.

'But will you cook non vegetarian food'? he asked

'No. But if you want to eat non veg food, you are welcome to cook it yourself or order it from outside'

'Oh? I'm looking for a life partner who has same interests as me. And I would prefer if she is also non vegetarian. It would be difficult otherwise.

Tough Nishi wanted to say. Instead she said 'Well good luck then. I hope you will find a wife whose food habits match yours'

More disillusionment. She had heard of people matching horoscopes. But matching dietary preferences? That had to be a first! Did one really need to use food habits as basis for choosing a life partner? Why this insistence for standardisation? Same caste, same religion, now same food?!

Maybe she was a fool. But she did believe that it was possible to coexist and that diversity made a marriage interesting. It helped you retain your individuality, your uniqueness. Oh wait! The institution of marriage in India demands conformity, especially from women.

At this rate I'll never get married!

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7 Responses to Gastronomic Match

  1. radha says:

    The person I have been married too is a pure vegetarian. I turned vegetarian recently ( more because ordering food at a restaurant was easier!). The children are not. But I do find that when the man is a non-vegetarian, the woman makes an extra effort to cook for him. You do not find too many men turning vegetarian to 'share' food interests with their spouse.

  2. Deepa says:

    Good observation there Radha.

  3. Enjoyed reading this...

    Wonder why folks do not make use of 'cloning technology'... when all they want is 'standardisation'...

    P.S. Shubho Bijoya!!

  4. I don't know why.A non-veg turns easily to a vegan but not the otherway around.So long as there is no imposition that the spouse should conform to the other's food habits or make things that one doesn't like,there should be no hurdle in marrying

  5. I like this portion of the blog"it is a jungle out there".Would read the older posts gradually.

  6. Bedazzled says:

    I am surprised at how small things like a person's dietary preferences makes a huge difference in one's plans of getting hitched..I am so glad that i am off the matrimonial market .. too much pressure and disillusionment,like you put it .

  7. Enjoyed reading this...

    Wonder why folks do not make use of 'cloning technology'... when all they want is 'standardisation'...

    P.S. Shubho Bijoya!!